The Stoner Chronicles

February 26, 2002

Kids in the Hall 2002 Tour Dates.

February 25, 2002

wow..it's been a gosh darn while

what to do what to do

my laptop got back from disneyworld...she thought it was too hot there...more later on "a goth trapped in Disneyworld"
i feel totally left out of the loop, now that i'm back in full dork action...but i must say that life is good right now...bern is coming up to see me this weekend, and i've got tix in ROW TWO of the SHEAS PERFORMING
ARTS CENTER for THE KIDS IN THE HALL...my blog isn't working right so i can't see what i'm typing right
now...nowhow odd...o AR

February 16, 2002

well..i guess i have an audience that doesn't like to be told she needs narcs...even though she does...honey u just let me know...i'll blaze you...come on down to the B-lo for the tour..i work at Shea's, we could chill, smoke a doob with scott, watch the sunset together...

haha, i heart my blog, nothing like letting everyone else read your mind

so annie's off to florida, she's probably somewhere down the coast as i write, smokin a spliffy in the pure georgia air...

the quest for smoke continues...rye just ran to talk to our "special friend" with the "magic grass"...saturday night and once again our local arab market is out of phillies and dutchies...scott bless the west side of buffalo...

i have no comp...i'm on "kithfan21"'s..and it's rather slow...reminds me of a psyho i know...that rhymed...sweet as peaches...i wonder who's god pussy leaches...yea...whatever....

i'm passing out now...it's all blurry...dro's kickin in

February 15, 2002

Hangman


ok..so i don't know if that will work..but it's hangman..add it to your aim profile..this is what the beauty of life is made out of, my friends...

and this one might work if that one doesn't

Hangman

ha..i think that's the same thing..sheesh they must think we're stupid, or somein..

dear sweet mother of christ's mercy...life is good right now...for the KIDS IN THE HALL...are coming to Buffalo, at the end of March...i think i just....yup..i just orgasmed

in other news...well there really isn't any NEWS..maybe insignifigant little details for the rest of my life, now that kith is coming...now that bruce will finally breathe the same stagnant odor that is my existence...and even if it's just for a few seconds, we will be connected, and for one schrapnel of a second...he will be mine...

wow, i should have had a "stalker" disclaimer before that ....sniff garbage cans, much?

oh yea..i figured out the whole "kithfan21" drama...and of course now that i know i'm right, i doubt ill let that girl in on the misunderstanding...she needs some narcs, i should have offered her some dro or somethin....

and the weird part is..she's like sara's himmelfarb, ya know..like why don't you talk to ME if you have a problem, it's not like i'm not online 24 hours a day

enough of that...no psycho's will ruin my day

AHH and it's the very first show of the entire tour..which means they'll be a load of mistakes and such..jebus, i love improving too...

now if only bruce would come out with that new album...then i could just shoot myself promptly after listening to it a few times....

life is good, and if i could figure out how to add shit on to this lil blog...my mood would be "FUCKING A, BABY", with a little guy smoking a spliffy...

yea....

a spliffy

mmm

weed...


Annie's on her way to Disneyworld with her rich indian, aka "july"...man fuck the ears, i wonder if they sell mickey bongs...
ponder, ponder

bring out cha dead....bam...bring out cha dead....

well how do u know he's the king...?
oh that's easy..he hasn't got shit all over em...

holy requium, stonerman, i gotta watch the holy grail tomorrow...

yea so i still don't know how to do a link cause i'm an idiot..so here goes..from the stoner queen of pointless info..comes an entire page...of useless information...

http://website.lineone.net/~reesjones/completely_useless.htm


have fun kittens...who else thought it was for unlawful carnal knowledge????hmm??

"SO ARE WE GONNA DO A SECRET CUPID OR..."

it's technically not valentines day, but what the hey..i love everyone, everyone except for that psycho who emailed me today..i just mildly dislike her..cause it's valentines day, and cupid would get pissed off and cap my ass...


so i've got my little headphones on and i'm talking to ANDY THE KOALA..he's such a sexbot...him and russell crowe could shit in my mouth and rape me..i wouldn't mind

i skipped all my classes today..well psych was cancelled, and i automatically thought of my professor makin sweet sweet love to his ugly scientist wife...and you know he has one...

SOMEONE OUT THERE HAS A SWEATY GROIN FETISH...DOESN'T THAT MAKE YOU NERVOUS??

i tried to explain the bob marley conspiracy theory to barbara, but she just looked at me kinda funny...it's the CIA baby..they're out for us...

oh yea and to that psycho girl who emailed me a couple times today, u know who you are...yea she's one creepbot...

everyone's a robot today

bern called for like five minutes..mentioning to me how he was on E and a hot girlinvited him to her house..sometimes i wonder if he intentionally tries to get himself on my killfile...

i hope bern's dad can't get it up tonight so it ruins his dirty ass mother's day

god damn ho

jesus-bot, save me...the aussie likes older women..sheesh...time to get a receding hair line and saggy boobies...I LOVE YOU BERNIE...hehe

February 14, 2002

yea so this kind of psycho sounding perosn im'd me today....and i found it rather odd to learn that i was not the only one, when i was perusing the other bloggers..from a link of lynn's site...i gots to email sarah and ask her exactly what this person said to her...mine went something like this:

kithfan21: join?
me: ?
kithfan21: join or die
me: is this jesus again
kithfan21: the streets will flow with your blood
me: hey how did you know aunt flow's in town?
kithfan21: you mock me, but a revolution is nearing...
me: uh, ok thanks fur noticing


and then the bitch warned me....like *W*...

i'm gonna make you eat my bloody cunt, i'll make you join my revolution baby...."lick or die".....

i need some cookies n creme stat....

smoked today, then tina brought over some ice cream, i almost creamed...we downed a ten bag and listened to barbie's new mix...

i had some profound thoughts while i was ooffff the hook, but i furget them...

back to the drawing board.....


Which Trainspotting Character Are You?



February 13, 2002

lynn and i were just discussing how cool it would be to have a dick... i mean i've been obsessing about this for years...more to come on this thought later...


I am bad. So bad. I absolutely hate people and animals. In fact, I probably sacrifice them. No one likes me, but of course it isn't my fault. I should just go back to New York because I am a corrupt Jesus.


Take the What Jesus Would You Be? Quiz


grrr...why must my blogger eat my posts...i suppose it's much like me, if i were my video game character, pacman...i'm not suprised though, eating her way through life...

bern's supposed to call me tonight....ha...but i met this beautiful aussie online a couple nights ago...praise scott for the talk button on aim...he sounds sexy as hell..don't tell bernadette...he'll be red n white maple leaf with envy....anyway we talked about red kangaroo's that could beat a man to death, and how his brother works on the highway and scoops dead one's off the road all day long....now if only amherst could be that kewl...jebus, i need a koala....or at least a guinea pig that kinda sorta looks like one....


blah

i'm going to send out an open letter to LL Cool J....tell him how much both the real world sound bite guy and myself enjoy his classic "phenomenon"....

time fur womens studies....


What Video Game Character Are You? I am Pacman.I am Pacman.


I am an aggressive sort of personality, out to get what I can, when I can. I prefer to avoid confrontation, but sometimes when it's called for, I can be a powerful character. I tend to be afflicted with munchies constantly. What Video Game Character Are You?

February 12, 2002

damn radiohead cut the end of my post off...down with britian whimpy brats..down down down

yea so apparently blogger eats posts...like rosie at a buffet....and how the hell did i get to be radiohead, hmmmm? i used to breathe liam gallagher, i actually bought the oasis book "gettin high"...i must have sworn for three weeks straight, i lost my virginity to that book, and i'm the whiny lil radiohead pricks, there is something seriously wrong with the state of online polls today...at least Coldplay, at least the Blur....woo hoo, and it was all yellow....

aww that's not nice, i don't even think rosie is fat, i mean i'm fat, i eat lil chocolate donuts as if they are jolly ranchers, and my pants, they have revolted against my stomach

::::update::::

i think my belly button has gone rank again. this one time i got stoned and tryed to stuff a piece of pepperoni in there and it's been angry at me ever since, does anyone else have this problem?...who am i kiddding no one reads this shit...

okay, another stoner moment...today in womens poetry, we were talking about "the body" chapter in the book, and all these girls were trying to seriously analyze this poem about masturbation. note to author: if your writing a poem about double clickin the mouse button :

a. don't publish it because that just makes you look nasty and/or a lesbian
b. wouldn't it be cool if the poem was about whoopi goldberg...like whoopi masturbating...WHOOPPI!
c. i got off track there, and thirdly, if there is such a thing..shit i furgot...(jeopardy theme song)...oh well i had another point...see kids, this is what happens when you smoke the seeds, because if you smoke the seeds you will:
a. lose train of thought
b. give yourself a really cheap form of birth control, unless your a boy, because if ur a boy then you will:
a. lose your doo-doo power faster
b. shoot ur doo-doo daa unexpectedly
c. you probably won't get to stick your doo-doo in anyone's whoo-whoo because they don't want your daa to make a baa-baa
clear?

yes so they were trying to analyze this poem, and i say "well maybe i'm just a horndog...but....(then i realize i said horndog, and start laughing uncontrollably in the lesbian self-help circle we casually form every class)...and everyone is just staring at me, if magalicious was there, well, yea she'd probably look at me funny too...but i thought it was funny

i damn missed psych today AGAIN...i'm going to freakin kill josephat...die, die with green beans stuck up his doo-doo

favorite stoner song of the moment: the terrier song (WHEN PEOPLE PUT BANDANAS ON THEIR DOG)

favorite stoner quote of the day: "this makes you think"--rye, after doing 3 lines


Which British Band Are You?

February 11, 2002

back online...do i have a life...i think not...

gee i wonder if they have a ticker for folks who stop smoking..i've been nicotine free since 10:30am Sunday morning, but not by choice really, i spent all my money this weekend on smoke, and then i smoked it all and now i don't have any ciggies...ah if i knew french i'd say something profound about that...

ryan's living with brooklynator in riverside, i don't think you could get any trashier...it's like he waved his finger blindly over a map of B-lo and said...right here, and there we were...in...riverside; i suppose it's better than cherry creek, though

update on my hunt for a job: i'm sitting here, aren't i? ha, job

favorite stoner album of the moment: Willy wonka soundtrack

favorite stoner quote: "you're going to jew jail, chump change"--angelator

well..i haven't smoked since...yea saturday night, sunday morning, went to barbara's wild b-day party, we played elevator tag fur three hours and then collapsed in the game room after a hearty game of stoner scrabble (explination: this is a highly intensified game, where contestants play for munchies and dares, no chickens..wooohhoooo) i ended up winning by mega points, ate a box of sausalito's and passed out on a bed with my sister...yes i kept my fingers to myself...then i woke up headed down to the computer lab and cried over all the shit that's been goin on with bern...i made up a list of questions to ask him, if he actually calls me...

joey's bout to come pick me up...we'll probably do the usual... drive nowhere and fight about each others boyfriends...(rewind to 1998 where if b. knew this scenario was going to happen, she quite ironically would have never known him in the first place)...ta ha..te he...i mean joe's my best friend...he'd do anything for me, buti could have totally found another guy who wouldn't give me lip like a horny puppy in the night...god i love you joey....i hate the world

confusidad...

yes so welcome to my world...i suppose this is what i've always wanted, a big table to dance on where people would nod politely, without throwing money at me...

what's up in the life of your soon to be favorite stoner?....

well yesterday i almost ate my remote, which i suppose is better than losing it, but still makes a girl think about her social standing...as in why she isn't out eating other pendulous objects instead of the clicker...i once knew a kid who called his dick flipper...but it's really a long story

bern is acting like an asshole, as usual, sometimes i wonder why i can't just find a nice boy who isn't bad and would still give me free drugs...

i'm skipping english today

dog food smells rank as hell

does anyone else think charlize theron is hotter than a pig in august

i joined the kids in the hall ng last week...talk about drama...

but you gotta love their flava...look for my kithie renditions of new rap songs..coming soon

and just to show you that i'm the ultimate stoner...there was a previous blog created, but i lost my train of thought and got frustrated with it..so i decided to start fresh...ha foiled again, satan!