In case you were wondering...

from paul's family:

1. An *awesome* Lennon book
2. An *awesome* coupon book (buy one get one KFC!)
3. Fast Food Nation, a book I borrowed but returned before I read but now I have it to read on the plane.
4. Plane tickets to San Fran to see the BRUCIO!
5. A big box of Ferraro Rocher...which me and birdman got as a joint gift, and which the dogs proceeded to eat while we were watching the Ali G. Show. And which also made us wake up in a pile of Mr. Squeekers vomit the following morning.
6. A bunk ass 15 year old umbrella
7. Mississippi and Alabama coffee mugs (from birdman's cheap rich gay uncles)
The quote of Christmas eve: "I got this from family dollar"-paul's uncle
8. Some baking pans and a festive dish made by slaves in Thailand.
My second favorite quote of Christmas Eve: "did you know the girl that made that dish makes 400 dollars a year?"-paul's aunt

I would like to state that I did receive three separate multicolored glassware sets from both sides of my family. My cousin bought me multicolored tumblers, my mom bought me multicolored wine glasses and paul's little whore sister (sorry paul) got us multicolored coke glasses. Certainly a popular item this year, I am assuming. Did anyone else get multicolored glassware?

This is the first Christmas in about 4 years where I did not receive a smoking device. I am saddened but there is still hope that Balsano will pull through with a pipe.

My Family:

1. A Karaoke machine, given to me by birdman, complete with an old school rap CD that features Funky Comedina, Baby Got Back and Whoomp, there it is. For the past few days, I have not been able to get the first line of the last song I mentioned out of my head. It even plays while i'm sleeping. This rings true for everyone in the house, and we have become accustomed to screaming "Party People..dun dun!"to the four dogs on our love seat (Apollo, my stepdog, comes to visit for the holidays). And for the record, perhaps the funniest thing I've seen all year is Birdman attempting to break it down with Rapper's Delight all raucous at 2am on our futon. I will admit I always wanted to try out for the drill team in highschool.
2. I'm sorry that present description was so long, it won't happen again.
3. XM radio from Angelator (ANGELATOR HAS UPDATED HER BLOG, GO CHECK OUT ANGELATOR'S BLOG!)
4. SPONGE CANDY
5. Money, money, money, money...mon-nay. My family likes to have us pick out our own presents.
6. Ali G. Season One. For anyone that is a fan of the show, they have the complete version of "SPYZ"on the extras cd entitled "Unseen Shit", which I highly recommend checking out...high.
7. Car Wash Gift Certificates, TGIF Gift Certificates, Denny's Gift Certificates, Applebee's Gift Certificates...

I would like to also state, for the record, that I DID NOT receive the only thing I actually asked for, as usual. So if any of my readers would like to get together and pitch in a couple of dollars a piece, I would really enjoy seeing a big bundle in the mail next week with the SNL edition of Trivial Pursuit wrapped up with a red bow. Email me, and we can do a paypal thing.

I just had some Splenda in my tea, because I am suffering from a sinus problem, and now I have to go shit for a bit.

Happy Kwanzaa everybody!